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WWE in 2003: EWR Saloon only serving non-alcoholic drinks.


Chris2K

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NB: I've already got quite far into this (by that I mean a week and a bit), so I'll be posting shows every so often. If I don't listen to your feedback, it's not because I'm not respecting it, it's because the shows are already written ;).

 

It's January 1st 2003, and I, Christopher Dewing have kidnapped Stephanie McMahon. I am holding her hostage for one reason and one reason only: I want a job in the WWE. Now most people want a job in the WWE to be the best wrestler ever. But I would much rather be a writer, a booker, someone to take the bare bones of a talent and make them stars. So I've kidnapped Stephanie to make Vince give me a job. It'll work... right?

 

Well I never found out, because I woke up. But I knew what I had to do... I opened up Extreme Warfare Revenge. And played it.

 

Welcome back to 2003. We've had necrophilia, and we've had Shawn Michaels win the World Title. But not any more. Things will be different... well a bit different. I'll try to continue angles that were going on then, but some new ones will arise.

 

Here's a brief recap of the last two main shows at the end of 2002 (not including best of shows):

 

Raw - December 23rd 2002

 

Rob Van Dam and Kane defeated Rosey and Jamal...Hurricane Helms defeated Christopher Nowinski...David Batista defeated Spike Dudley...Jacquline, Stacy Kiebler, and Trish Stratus defeated Ivory, Molly Holly, and Victoria...World Tag Team Champions, Booker T. and Goldust, defeated Chris Jericho and Christian...Test defeated D'Lo Brown by Disqualification...Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler defeated William Regal and Lance Storm.

 

SmackDown! - December 26th 2002

 

Bill DeMott defeated Crash Holly...World Tag Team Champions, Eddie and Chavo Guerrero, defeated Edge and Billy Kidman...Rikishi defeated B2 (Bull Buchanan)...Chris Benoit defeated The Big Show.

 

And have a roster as well:

 

MAIN EVENTERS

 

Big Show [smackDown!]

Bill Goldberg [RAW]

Brock Lesnar [smackDown!]

Hulk Hogan [smackDown!]

Kurt Angle [smackDown!] (WWE Champion)

Shawn Michaels [RAW]

The Rock [RAW]

The Undertaker [smackDown!]

Triple H [RAW] (World Champion)

 

UPPER MIDCARDERS

 

Booker T [RAW] (World Tag Team Champion)

Chris Benoit [smackDown!]

Chris Jericho [RAW]

Eddie Guerrero [smackDown!] (WWE Tag Team Champion)

Edge [smackDown!]

Kane [RAW]

Rob Van Dam [RAW]

Scott Steiner [RAW]

 

MIDCARDERS

 

Al Snow [RAW]

A-Train [smackDown!]

Billy Kidman [smackDown!] (Cruiserweight Champion)

Bubba Ray Dudley [RAW]

Charlie Haas [smackDown!]

Chavo Guerrero Jr [smackDown!] (WWE Tag Team Champion)

Chief Morley [RAW]

Chris Kanyon [smackDown!]

Christian [RAW]

D-Von Dudley [RAW]

Goldust [RAW] (World Tag Team Champion)

Jamal [RAW]

Jeff Hardy [RAW]

John Cena [smackDown!]

Lance Storm [RAW]

Lita [RAW]

Matt Hardy [smackDown!]

Molly Holly [RAW]

Nathan Jones [smackDown!]

Randy Orton [RAW]

Rey Mysterio Jr. [smackDown!]

Rhyno [smackDown!]

Rico [RAW]

Rikishi [smackDown!]

Rosey [RAW]

Sable [smackDown!]

Shelton Benjamin [smackDown!]

Spike Dudley [RAW]

Tajiri [smackDown!]

Test [RAW]

The Hurricane [RAW]

Trish Stratus [RAW]

William Regal [RAW]

 

LOWER MIDCARDERS

 

Bill DeMott [smackDown!]

Brian Kendrick [smackDown!]

Christopher Nowinski [RAW]

Chuck Palumbo [smackDown!]

Crash Holly [smackDown!]

Hardcore Holly [smackDown!]

Jamie Noble [smackDown!]

Jazz [RAW]

Johnny Stamboli [smackDown!]

Maven [RAW]

Nunzio [smackDown!]

Scotty 2 Hotty [smackDown!]

Sean O'Haire [smackDown!]

Shannon Moore [smackDown!]

Steven Richards [RAW]

Tommy Dreamer [RAW]

Victoria [RAW] (Women's Champion)

 

OPENERS

 

Funaki [smackDown!]

Ivory [RAW]

Jacqueline [RAW]

 

So, might as well get going. First show will be SmackDown on the 2nd of January.

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PREVIEW

 

DAWN'S GETTING MARRIED IN THE EVENING...

 

http://w2.owow.com/RingsideWith/RawAction/10-04-02/43.jpg

 

It's set to be a jam-packed SmackDown! this week, as a few matches have already been announced! Billy Kidman will defend his WWE Cruiserweight Title against M'Fer Shannon Moore, and John Cena will take on one half of the WWE Tag Team Champions Eddie Guerrero! Also, Paul Heyman himself has informed us that Team Angle will make their debuts tonight in a tag team match against unknown opponents!

 

However, the part of the show that will no doubt have everyone talking is the joining of Dawn Marie and her lover Al Wilson in holy matrimony! What will Torrie, Al's daughter, have to say about the matter? Will the couple get hitched, or will there be a hitch that stops them?

 

Find out this Thursday night on UPN's SmackDown! (8/7 CT)

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Excellent, I've been reading this over in the EWB boards and it's been pretty good so far. I'm lookin forward to the wedding angle on Smackdown. It's a cracker
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January 2nd 2003

 

Angle tells Brock who's in charge, but Stephanie shows it.

 

We kick off 2003 with the WWE with WWE Champion Kurt Angle coming out to the ring by himself to speak to the crowd, and the millions of viewers. Angle continues to brag about how he outsmarted Brock Lesnar with his ruse with Paul Heyman, and how his 'students' Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin, aka Team Angle, will prove to the world how Angle is not only the greatest wrestler in the WWE, but also the smartest and most productive leader. Angle promises Lesnar that he'll make sure that he won't win the Royal Rumble, and definitely won't get a title shot any time soon.

 

However, before Angle can finish, Stephanie McMahon, the General Manager of SmackDown comes out and reminds Angle that she distributes the title shots, he can only find excuses not to. However, she will not be giving Brock a title shot tonight, as he will be teaming up with Chris Benoit to take on Angle and his always reliable agent, Paul Heyman! Stephanie leaves Angle in the ring looking 'angry' and 'upset'.

 

Rating: 89%

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

WWE Cruiserweight Title Match

Billy Kidman © vs. Shannon Moore (w/ Matt Hardy)

 

The Cruiserweight champion may have been forgiven for taking Moore a bit lightly, but there was no doubt in anyone's mind that Shannon Moore gave 110% in this match, doing everything within his power to try and defeat Kidman and win the Cruiserweight title. Towards the end of the match, Moore hit a running leg sweep on Kidman to take him down to the mat, and ascended to the top-rope hoping to hit a moonsault. However, Matt Hardy then chooses his time to get up on the apron to distract the referee, even though his protegée is about to win the match.

 

Moore hits the Moonsault, and covers Kidman, but the referee is still distracted with Hardy. The referee finally turns around, but Kidman is able to kick out at two. Moore is visibly upset at Matt's distraction, and goes over to remonstrate with him. Hardy however sees Kidman getting back to his feet, and runs into the ring, drawing a disqualification. Matt continues to beat away at Kidman, and ignores Moore's protests. Matt hits a Twist of Fate on the champion, before heading to the corner to do the Mattitude sign, whilst Moore looks on folornly.

 

Winner by DQ: Billy Kidman

Crowd: 56%

Match: 95%

Overall: 75%

Stars: ****

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Cena's insults aren't appreciated by all...

 

Backstage, Josh Matthews stands with John Cena, who faces off against Eddie Guerrero later tonight. Cena proceeds to cut an anti-Latino rap, going through all the stereotypes such as Eddie should be cutting his lawn and making burritos instead of wrestling him tonight, which doesn't go down very well with the Albuquerque fans.

 

It also doesn't go down very with Rey Mysterio Jr., who happens to be walking past Cena whilst he speaks. Mysterio challenges Cena to prove how much 'tougher' he is, but instead of fighting Rey, Cena chooses to punk him out with the microphone he was using. Cena then walks off, as Josh Matthews tries to help Rey back to his feet.

 

Rating: 82%

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Team Angle vs. Funaki and Tajiri

 

Team Angle go out all guns blazing for their debut match, not wasting any time in going on the offence against their lighter opponents. Haas and Benjamin display their technical skills in this rather short match, concentrating more on wearing down Funaki than his more experienced partner Tajiri. Funaki finally manages to hit a neckbreaker to turn the tide, and makes the tag to Tajiri.

 

Tajiri unloads his usual kicks to both Haas and Benjamin, and then locks the Tarantula in on Haas to pop the crowd. However, after he unlocks the hold, he walks straight into a Superkick from Benjamin. Benjamin then covers Tajiri, and gets the three count with his feet on the ropes. Benjamin and Haas leave the ring and begin to celebrate in incredibly excitable and exuberant ways, much like Angle did when he started in the WWE.

 

Winners by Pinfall: Team Angle

Crowd: 65%

Match: 79%

Overall: 72%

Stars: ***

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Pre-wedding jitters… but not from the bride…

 

Backstage, we see Dawn Marie getting ready for her imminent wedding ceremony, wearing a white sequin dress with matching veil. Whilst she puts her lipstick on, she notices something in the mirror, and turns around to see Torrie Wilson standing there, not looking particularly happy. Torrie doesn’t let Dawn get a word in, as she explains that there’s nothing she can do to stop the wedding, but she warns Dawn that if she hurts her father mentally or physically, she’ll have Torrie to answer to. Torrie walks out, as Dawn watches on with a bitter expression.

 

Rating: 82%

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The Wedding…

 

A traditional church organ piece plays as Al Wilson makes his way to the ring wearing an expensive-looking black tuxedo. Already set up in the ring are a choir, and a balding minister. Al slowly makes his way to the ring, and finally gets into it, shaking hands with the minister. The Wedding March then strikes up, and Dawn Marie comes out in the dress we’ve just seen her in. She walks down with two young girls carrying her train, and climbs into the ring. The minister begins the ceremonies, but before Dawn can finish her vows, an unknown man runs in from the crowd, and knocks the minister out.

 

He then looks straight in the eyes of Al, and nails him with a hard right hand. He then hits the Simoniser on Al, which reveals to the commentary team at least that this is Simon Diamond. Diamond grabs the mic and says that Dawn is engaged to HIM, and kicks him in the ribs whilst he lies on the floor. He looks at Dawn, and the two make out in the middle of the ring. They leave arm in arm, as Al is knocked out in the middle of the ring, and the choir have no idea what they should do.

 

Rating: 71%

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

John Cena (w/ B Squared) vs. Eddie Guerrero (WWE Tag Team Champion, w/ Chavo Guerrero Jr.)

 

Cena gives a credible performance against the vastly experienced Guerrero, using all of his trademark moves such as the “wait a minute after hitting the ropes to do a fist drop” and the “I can see my hand moving” taunt. However, Eddie’s courage and battling spirit stop Cena from picking up the win, even when B-Squared interferes to trip the Tag Team Champion up. This starts up a brawl on the outside between Chavo and B-Squared, which doesn’t go too well for the lighter Chavo. It does however distract the referee, and this allows Cena to grab the chain he brought to the ring with him, and nail Eddie with it right between the eyes. The referee turns around to see Cena covering Eddie, and he counts the three to give Cena the win!

 

As Cena celebrates however, Rey Mysterio Jr. comes running down to the ring, hoping to avenge both the attack on his fellow Latinos and Cena’s physical attack on him from earlier on. Rey ducks an attempted clothesline by Cena, and nails him in the back. He then runs to the ropes and hits the 619 on the master of thuganomics. Rey heads to the top rope, but instead of hitting another move on Cena, he dives off the top rope and lands a plancha on B-Squared! Rey jumps back up and heads off down the ramp with his music playing, having sent Cena a message!

 

Winner by Pinfall: John Cena

Crowd: 83%

Match: 79%

Overall: 81%

Stars: ***

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Backstage, a rather beat up Funaki, SmackDown!’s number one announcer knocks on Paul Heyman’s door. The man himself answers, smirking at Funaki and congratulating him on his ‘valiant effort’ against his newest tag team earlier tonight. Heyman then goes on to say how he isn’t scared of being in the same ring with Lesnar tonight, regardless of what Heyman has done to him in the past. He’s sure that Brock will remember how he brought him into the WWE in the first place, and owes him for that. And besides, he can carry his way in the ring, and won’t need Angle to help him out… much.

 

Rating: 81%

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Edge and Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Big Show and A-Train

 

Rey, who seems to have been everywhere tonight, gets dominated for long spells of the match by the much larger and stronger Big Show and A-Train. Big Show especially seems to have renewed vigour and intensity, really destroying both Rey and Edge as much as possible. Eventually, Show grabs Edge and takes him out of the ring, throwing him over the barricade and stomping away at the former-Intercontinental champion. A-Train on the other hand takes advantage of John Cena running in and nailing Rey with his chain as he goes for the 619, and A-Train wastes little time in hitting the Derailer to take the pinfall victory.

 

Winners by pinfall: A-Train and Big Show

Crowd: 83%

Match: 73%

Overall: 79%

Stars: **3/4

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

MAIN EVENT

Kurt Angle (WWE Champion) and Paul Heyman vs. Brock Lesnar and Chris Benoit

 

The big main event of the evening came around, and unsurprisingly it was Kurt Angle that did most of the wrestling for his team, leaving Heyman to the clapping and cheering on the apron. However, Angle was able to hold his own with both Benoit and Lesnar, but soon the numbers game proved too much, and he began to tire. Angle hit a neckbreaker on Benoit that kept both men down, and Heyman saw this as his opportunity to make a mark in the match. He tagged himself in, but no sooner did he do that then Brock Lesnar entered the ring and stared down at him, sending Heyman running out of the ring. Angle manages to get back to his feet, and manages to baseball slide Lesnar as he runs past, knocking him down. Angle then heads outside himself, and starts unloading right hand after right hand to Brock, keeping him down on the mat. This gives Heyman the chance to get back into the ring, but as he does, he comes face to face with the now recovered Benoit. Heyman goes to strike Benoit, but the Rabid Wolverine simply grabs Heyman’s arm, and locks him in the Crippler Crossface, and Heyman wastes little time in tapping out!

 

Benoit keeps the hold on for a bit longer, but soon releases it and begins to celebrate. However, his celebration his short-lived, as the Big Show comes out and knocks Benoit down with a right hand! Show then picks Benoit up, and press-slams him out of the ring with ease, before joining Benoit on the outside. Show starts removing the monitors from the SmackDown! Announce table, and drags Benoit to his feet. He picks Benoit up with one hand, and savagely Chokeslams him through the announce table. Show smirks at the carnage he has created as SmackDown! goes off the air!

 

Winners by Submission: Benoit and Lesnar

Crowd: 88%

Match: 73%

Overall: 83

Stars: ***

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

OVERALL SHOW: 78%

Attendance: 7,530

Takings: $301,200

RATING: 5.73

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Match of the Night: Billy Kidman vs. Shannon Moore

Worst Match of the Night: Team Angle vs. Funaki/Tajiri

Segment of the Night: Angle interview

Worst Segment of the Night: The Wedding

Show MVP: Kurt Angle

Show Idiot: Al Wilson

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Feedback is appreciated :).

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Show Idiot: Al Wilson[/b]

Lmao, excellent. I am glad to see this diary here as it's a good read however it will now show that actually even though I'm hordes better at these diaries than draven and fletch ;) i'm actually not that good at all.

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PREVIEW

 

HARDCORE VELOCITY

 

http://www.tsn.ca/images/stories/20031218/holly_76421.jpg

 

This week's Velocity welcomes Hardcore Holly to the show, as he goes one-on-one with Brian Kendrick. Also, Billy Gunn takes on Nunzio, and Matt Hardy and Rikishi will also be in action!

 

Plus, re-live the action from this week's SmackDown!, as well as much more!

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January 4th 2003

 

Nunzio vs. Billy Gunn

 

A surprisingly good match that was mainly carried by Nunzio, but had Gunn getting in most of the offence. However, after Gunn set up for a Fameasser, Nunzio ducked out of the way, and rolled up Gunn with a handful of tights to get the victory.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Nunzio~

~Crowd: 63%~

~Match: 81%~

~Overall: 72%~

~Stars: ***~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap: John Cena and Rey Mysterio Jr.’s SmackDown! confrontations

 

Backstage, Josh Matthews stands with John Cena, who faces off against Eddie Guerrero later tonight. Cena proceeds to cut an anti-Latino rap, going through all the stereotypes such as Eddie should be cutting his lawn and making burritos instead of wrestling him tonight, which doesn't go down very well with the Albuquerque fans. It also doesn't go down very with Rey Mysterio Jr., who happens to be walking past Cena whilst he speaks. Mysterio challenges Cena to prove how much 'tougher' he is, but instead of fighting Rey, Cena chooses to punk him out with the microphone he was using. Cena then walks off, as Josh Matthews tries to help Rey back to his feet.

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

John Cena vs. Eddie Guerrero

 

As Cena celebrates however, Rey Mysterio Jr. comes running down to the ring, hoping to avenge both the attack on his fellow Latinos and Cena’s physical attack on him from earlier on. Rey ducks an attempted clothesline by Cena, and nails him in the back. He then runs to the ropes and hits the 619 on the master of thuganomics. Rey heads to the top rope, but instead of hitting another move on Cena, he dives off the top rope and lands a plancha on B-Squared! Rey jumps back up and heads off down the ramp with his music playing, having sent Cena a message!

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

Rey Mysterio Jr. & Edge vs. A-Train and Big Show

 

A-Train on the other hand takes advantage of John Cena running in and nailing Rey with his chain as he goes for the 619, and A-Train wastes little time in hitting the Derailer to take the pinfall victory.

 

~Rating: 75%~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Rikishi vs. Rocky Romero

 

The 400 pound Samoan took little time in decimating his opponent Romero, using all of his trademark moves. After Rikishi had hit the Rumpshaker, Romero stood no chance of getting up, and Rikishi took the win, before dancing for the fans.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Rikishi~

~Crowd: 55%~

~Match: 66%~

~Overall: 60%~

~Stars: **~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Matt Hardy vs. Eric Justice

 

The sensei of Mattitude did a good job of living up to his credentials with a dominating performance against Justice, despite being hampered by a height and size disadvantage. Justice’s strength meant that Matt couldn’t hit the Twist of Fate, however a top-rope yodelling legdrop was enough to finish the match.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Matt Hardy Version 1.0~

~Crowd: 63%~

~Match: 68%~

~Overall: 65%~

~Stars: **1/2~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap: Chris Benoit and the Big Show.

 

Chris Benoit & Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle & Paul Heyman

 

This gives Heyman the chance to get back into the ring, but as he does, he comes face to face with the now recovered Benoit. Heyman goes to strike Benoit, but the Rabid Wolverine simply grabs Heyman’s arm, and locks him in the Crippler Crossface, and Heyman wastes little time in tapping out! Benoit keeps the hold on for a bit longer, but soon releases it and begins to celebrate. However, his celebration his short-lived, as the Big Show comes out and knocks Benoit down with a right hand! Show then picks Benoit up, and press-slams him out of the ring with ease, before joining Benoit on the outside. Show starts removing the monitors from the SmackDown! Announce table, and drags Benoit to his feet. He picks Benoit up with one hand, and savagely Chokeslams him through the announce table. Show smirks at the carnage he has created.

 

~Rating: 72%~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

MAIN EVENT

Hardcore Holly vs. Brian Kendrick

 

The wily veteran Hardcore Holly used every cheap trick he could think of to try and ground the quick and feisty Kendrick. Holly eventually took the win in the match when an attempted crossbody from the top-rope by Kendrick was reversed into the Alabama Slam, and the subsequent pinfall. After the match, Holly gave Kendrick another Alabama Slam, before spitting on him and walking off.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Hardcore Holly~

~Crowd: 56%~

~Match: 75%~

~Overall: 65%~

~Stars: **1/2~

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

OVERALL SHOW: 62%

Attendance: 7,524

Takings: $300,960

RATING: 4.22

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

MATCH OF THE NIGHT: NUNZIO VS. BILLY GUNN

WORST MATCH OF THE NIGHT: RIKISHI VS. ROCKY ROMERO

RECAP OF THE NIGHT: CENA/MYSTERIO

WORST RECAP OF THE NIGHT: BENOIT/SHOW

SHOW MVP: MATT HARDY

SHOW IDIOT: ROCKY ROMERO

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

E-MAILS

 

Show Notes

 

GerryBrisco@ WWE.com: A couple of Velocity matches didn't work too well, Rikishi vs. Rocky Romero and Matt Hardy vs. Eric Justice. I don't think we should hire those two workers again.

 

PatPatterson@ Legal4U.com: John Cena and Rey Mysterio Jr. were overworked on SmackDown!. Try to keep their appearances to a certain level.

 

Sophie@ WWE.com: The ratings for Velocity were good, and we outshone all our competition by miles.

 

Workers

 

JohnCena@ WWE.com: Yo yo yo, I should be moved up the card, I'm forcin' ya to feel it!

 

ReyMysterioJr@ WWE.com: Can I also get moved up the card?

 

TheRock@ LatestMovie.com: Now The Rock is back full-time, how about some matches with Scott Steiner?

 

TheodoreLong@WWE.com: I was going to work for WWA part-time, but thank you for your written contract!

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

Edited by Chris2K
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BEST OF 2002

 

(Stolen from PWTorch.com)

 

No pyro, no Lita, no problem. Tonight's edition of Heat was a "Best of 2002" show hosted by Jonathan Coachman; featuring Raw brand Superstars. Tough to watch, considering that "Code of Silence," starring Chuck Norris, is on FX. I love it when Chuck takes the robot and...well, anyway...

 

(1) Undertaker defeated Jeff Hardy to retain the WWE Title. This was the ladder match from the July 1 episode of Raw. That multicolored upstart Jeff Hardy had the audacity to challenge Mr. Decade of Destruction to a Hardy specialty in The Undertaker's own yard. What nerve. Being an over-the-hill ex-scooter tramp with bad knees myself, I really should go easier on Taker, but even though a Hardy win was teased throughout the match, you pretty much knew that Taker would win. Jeff got in a few good licks, but in the end succumbed to a choke-push-slam from the top of the ladder.

 

Hey, Jerry Lawler wrote a book! I can't wait for him to ask Judith Regan to show him her puppies.

 

Confidential Highlight: Fozzy makes a video. What's with the pig-head guy?

 

Lugz Boot of the Week: DX IS BACK! Oops, no it's not. Triple H attacks Shawn Michaels on Raw, which leads into --

 

(2) Shawn Michaels pinned Triple H in a Streetfight at Summerslam. Remember, kids, this match was not sanctioned by Eric Bischoff! Well, even with "no controlling legal authority," this was one terrific match. HBK's performance, coming as it did following his four-year hiatus, was truly spectacular. Not only his highspots, like setting up Triple H on a table outside the ring and splashing him through it from the top turnbuckle, but the way he played to the crowd was magnificent. For one brief, shining moment, he was "The Showstoppa" again.

 

This match was the icing on the cake for Summerslam (in my opinion, the best WWE PPV of 2002; yes, even better than WrestleMania). In the end, HBK countered a Pedigree and rolled over a battered and bloody Triple H to get the duke. As the crowd went nuts, Triple H attacked Michaels with a sledgehammer. For some reason, this match was shown in black and white, with the sledgehammer attack heavily edited. It's like, all of a sudden MTV has standards.

 

Tough Enough 3 Highlights: Can you buy Jonah as Hamlet? "To wrestle, or not to wrestle..." So long, Justin. You can pick up a personality on your way out.

 

Wow! Triple H vs. Scott Steiner at The Royal Rumble! What blazing action that promises to be! I'm trembling with anticipation. Yawn Shaka Laka.

 

Raw Retro: May 24, 1999; The Owen Hart Tribute. Rest In Peace, Owen.

 

WWE PS2 Rewind: Vince McMahon introduces Eric Bischoff as Raw's new General Manager. As surreal as it gets.

 

(3) Kane defeated Chris Jericho & Christian and Bubba Ray & Spike Dudley and Rob Van Dam & Jeff Hardy to retain the WWE Tag Team Titles in a TLC Match (whew). Talk about carnage! This was mega-carnage from start to finish. Actually, it began with Y2J and Christian beating down Kane's partner, The Hurricane, earlier in the program, preventing him from competing in the match. This wasn't shown tonight, although Jim Ross did mention it during his commentary.

 

The highlight of Eric Bischoff's Oct 7 Raw Roulette from Las Vegas, there were highspots galore, including a Van Terminator that had RVD jumping the length of the ring to knock Kane through the ropes and onto the floor. Bodies were flying off ladders, through tables; it was awesome. In the end, Kane chokeslammed Y2J from the top of a ladder and grabbed the belts (as Jericho steadied the ladder for him).

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PREVIEW

 

 

THE FALLOUT OF ARM-WRESTLING

 

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Two weeks ago on RAW, Scott Steiner defeated Triple H. Unfortunately for Big Poppa Pump, it was only an arm-wrestling contest, but what will HHH say having lost his momentum?

 

Also, Shawn Michaels will be in the house on RAW, but what will the HeartBreak Kid's purpose for being there be?

 

Chris Jericho will also debut a new segment especially for him tonight, the Hi-Lite Reel, where Jericho will interview a superstar about their recent actions.

 

With all this, and more happening on RAW, don't miss it on the NEW TNN! (8/7 CT)

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January 6th 2003

 

Hosted by Jim Ross and Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler

 

The Nature Boy’s warning to Steiner

 

We kick off RAW with Triple H coming down to the ring as he so often does, accompanied by Ric Flair. The Game soon gets to the ring, but instead of speaking himself, he lets his manager do the job for him.

 

Flair: Last week… last week we saw this man here, the World Heavyweight champion, the Cerebral Assassin, the Game, Triple H, was defeated by that Neanderthal wannabe Scott Steiner in an arm wrestling contest. Now my client Triple H would love to be able to register his disgust to you all, but he’s embarrassed. Not only is he embarrassed about losing to Scott Steiner in that arm wrestling contest last week, but also because he’s embarrassed about having to be in Phoenix tonight! So I’m gonna be speaking for him, and you idiots are gonna listen to me! Last week was a one off! That will be the LAST time you see Steiner defeat The Game at anything! And if anyone even thinks that come the Royal Rumble, when Triple H defends his World Heavyweight Title against Steiner, Steiner’s gonna beat him then and become the World Champion, you can think again! These pointless little games mean nothing! Eric Bischoff may have put an order out to stop Triple H and Steiner touching each other before their match, but that doesn’t mean I can’t! So guess what Steiner, you’re gonna have your first match in the WWE for some time, when you take on me, The Nature Boy, RIC FLAIR! WHOOOO!

 

The crowd understandably cheer this announcement.

 

Flair: I don’t know what you guys are cheering for, because I sure as hell don’t wanna do any wrestling in this god-forsaken city! It’s gonna be me, Ric Flair, versus Scott Steiner, next week, in Mohegan Sun, Connecticut !! WHOOO! But as for tonight, Steiner, you haven’t signed your contract for your title shot, so make sure you’re around later to sign it in THIS VERY RING!

 

~Rating: 97%~

 

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Match #1

Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowinski

 

The king of extreme Jeff Hardy takes on Chris Nowinski in what promised to be a close and exciting battle. However, the match is slightly disturbed when Hardy blows out his leg attempting to hit the Whisper in the Wind on Nowinski, and for the rest of the match, Nowinski tries to work on Hardy’s leg, locking in a single leg crab at one point, which Jeff struggles to make the ropes, but eventually does. Jeff gets set up on the top rope as Nowinski looks to finish things with a Superplex, but Jeff manages to punch him in the ribs, and drop him back down to the ring. Jeff then climbs up to his feet, and bad leg and all hits the Swanton Bomb. The cover is made, and the victory goes to Jeff.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Jeff Hardy

~Crowd: 64%~

~Match: 78%~

~Overall: 71%~

~Stars: **3/4~

 

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The sheriff’s back in town…

 

We head BACKSTAGE~! to the parking lot to see a limousine arriving in the arena. The crowd pops as Shawn Michaels steps out, wearing his usual cowboy hat and jeans. Michaels continues walking to into the arena, as the commentators hype the arrival of the former World Champion.

 

~Rating: 91%~

 

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Match #2

The Dudley Boyz (w/ Spike Dudley) vs. 3 Minute Warning (w/ Rico)

 

The long-rumbling feud between The Dudleys and 3 Minute Warning continues, with both Rico and Spike getting involved in this match on several occasions. It’s a Rico interference, grabbing hold of D-Von’s foot as he hits the ropes, that turns the tide in favour of the Samoans, and Rosey and Jamal take turns tagging in and hitting D-Von with powerful brawling moves, whilst also taunting Bubba Ray as his half-brother gets a beating. D-Von starts to make a comeback, but as he goes to tag in Bubba, Rico again distracts the referee, causing the tag to be deemed illegal. This brings Spike over to Rico, and he knocks him down and out of the way. Jamal comes over to try and take care of Spike, but this means that Rosey is left alone in the ring. Bubba hits a scoop slam on Rosey, and D-Von hits the Wazzup Headbutt to the delight of the fans. Bubba sends D-Von to get the tables, but before he does, Jamal comes round and nails D-Von from behind. D-Von gets rolled back into the ring as Rosey gets back to his feet, but Bubba Ray managers to intercept before any more damage can be done. Bubba picks Rosey up in a Full Nelson, and hits the Bubba Bomb, before laying D-Von over the Samoan! Bubba takes care of Jamal as the referee counts the three!

 

~Winners by Pinfall: The Dudley Boyz~

~Crowd: 69%~

~Match: 89%~

~Overall: 79%~

~Stars: ***1/2~

 

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Bischoff makes our main event

 

Backstage, we see Eric Bischoff in his office, when Rob Van Dam walks in without knocking.

 

RVD: You wanted to see me?

 

Bischoff: Yes, I did. Rob, two weeks ago you showed everyone that you and Kane are definitely a force to be reckoned with around here.

 

RVD: Well we are, so I was actually wondering if…

 

Bischoff: Oh I know you are, and that’s why I’m not letting you team up with Kane anymore.

 

RVD: What? That’s not…

 

Bischoff: You and Kane could do me some damage Rob, and I can’t afford that. However, as I’m such a kind and generous General Manager, I will give you another chance of becoming a singles star. You have Chris Jericho in the main event tonight, and if you win, I could be persuaded to try and get you a World Title shot. Think about it.

 

RVD looks at Bischoff, but walks out of his office without saying a word.

 

~Rating: 77%~

 

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Match #3

Booker T (World Tag Team Champion) vs. Test

 

The battle of the former partners was a close fought one, with Booker using his range of kicks to try and take down the more powerful Test. Test seems to have control of the match when he hits the Pumphandle Slam on Booker, but the 5-Time WCW Champion’s left arm manages to shoot off the canvas to stop the pinfall. Test gets ready to try and hit the Big Boot, but Booker sees him coming and moves, making Test crotch himself on the top rope. Test manages to get back down, but the damage is done, and he stumbles straight into a kick to the gut. Booker then comes off the ropes and nails the Scissors Kick, but Test manages to kick out. Booker picks him back up, and hits a second scissors kick, which is enough to keep Test down. Booker starts to celebrate with the Spinaroonie, but soon enough, Lance Storm and William Regal run down to the ring, and begin assaulting the Tag Team champion. Goldust runs in to try and save his partner, but he also suffers at the hands of Regal, Storm and the recovered Test.

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Booker T~

~Crowd: 77%~

~Match: 79%~

~Overall: 78%~

~Stars: ***~

 

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The Arrival of the Hi-Lite Reel

 

Chris Jericho comes out to introduce us to his new talk show, the Hi-Lite Reel.

 

Jericho: Ladies, gentlemen, and ugly children of all ages, allow me to introduce you to the debut edition of Chris Jericho’s Hi-Lite Reel! Now tonight, I was going to invite a very special guest to be the first interviewee for the show, and it was going to be somebody famous from right here in Phoenix, Arizona! But then I realised that there was NOBODY famous from Phoenix, so I changed my mind, and when Eric Bischoff told me that I would have the MAIN EVENT of the evening, I decided to invite my opponent on to the show, so give it up, for Rob, Van, Dam!

 

“One of a Kind” by Breaking Point hits, and Rob Van Dam comes out, looking slightly nervous about getting in the ring with the notoriously devious Jericho. However, he gets into the ring, and takes one of the two chairs on the set.

 

Jericho: RVD, it’s nice to see you here. So, let’s get straight to it, why did you want to team up with Kane?

 

RVD: Well Kan…

 

Jericho: Or maybe I should say, what “benefits” were there to teaming with Kane?

 

RVD: Um… well…

 

Jericho: I mean, was it a mutual relationship, or was Kane the dominant partner?

 

RVD: What the hell are you talking about?

 

Jericho: Oooh, looks like I’ve hit a nerve! Well you and Kane were kinda close, maybe you were very close?!

 

RVD: Well you and Christian are “kinda close”, maybe YOU and him are “very close”?!

 

Jericho: Heh, you know that’s funny, because Christian himself should make an answer!

 

From out of nowhere, Christian hits the ring behind RVD, and nails him from behind. He then picks RVD up, and drops him throat first on the back of his chair, before hitting the Unprettier on Mr. Monday Night. Jericho and Christian laugh at the pain of RVD, whilst Kane is nowhere to be seen…

 

~Rating: 84%~

 

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The show is temporarily interrupted by some RNN BREAKING NEWS~!

 

Orton: Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Sorry for interrupting the show, but I have some important news for all of my fans. My shoulder is now up to a WHOPPING 93% mobility! With just 7% more healing to go, I am glad to inform you that I will be at Raw next week in Conneticut, so all my fans, get your tickets ready for the show, because the O-Man is coming back! Oh, and don’t forget to send me your get well wishes to getwellrandy@wwe.com. Oh, and Nicole, if you have any more pics like the ones you sent me, send those as well.

 

~Rating: 76%~

 

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Your generic contract-signing sir….

 

Triple H and Ric Flair come back to the ring, where a table and chairs have been set up for the contract signing. The sirens then wail, and Scott Steiner makes his way out, complete with his usual chainmail headdress and his new ‘Big Poppa Pump’ t-shirt (available at WWEShopzone.com) (p.s. not really). Steiner climbs into the ring, and takes a seat, followed by Triple H, whilst Flair remains standing, overseeing the proceedings.

 

Flair: Right Steiner, if you can read the contract before signing it, provided that is you can actually read, then we get this over with.

 

However, Steiner jokingly offers his arm to Triple H for another arm-wrestling contest, which incenses Flair and HHH. Steiner takes his contract and signs it, before passing it over to HHH. Triple H then looks over the contract, annoying Steiner by not getting it over with quickly. Triple H then signs the contract, and hands it to the lawyer. The lawyer opens his briefcase, but instead of putting the contract in, he takes a steel pipe out, and smashes Steiner over the head with it! Flair then removes his jacket, as the lawyer continues to hit Steiner with the pipe. HHH watches on smiling as Flair and the lawyer continue beating away at Steiner, who now has a cut in his forehead.

 

~Rating: 80%~

 

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Match #4

MAIN EVENT

Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

 

RVD and Jericho put on a great match, and both men traded spells of having the advantage, with RVD using his trademark unique moves to take control at the start. A Rolling Thunder gets an early two count, but upon going for the move again, Jericho manages to roll RVD up into the Walls of Jericho, but RVD manages to make the ropes quickly. Jericho hit the facebuster, and looked for the Lionsault, but RVD rolled out the way, only to see Jericho land on his feet. RVD ducked a clothesline, and knocked Jericho down with a spinning kick to the face. After a Standing Moonsaut, RVD went for another cover, but Jericho again managed to kick out. The fight spilled to the outside, and Jericho was introduced to the barricade, and RVD hit his trademark kick from the apron to the barricade. However, a brief lapse in concentration from Van Dam allowed Jericho to reverse RVD’s attempt to whip him into the steel ringpost, sending RVD flying into it instead. Jericho picked RVD up and rolled him back in the ring, and again went for the Walls of Jericho, but RVD managed to reverse the move, and hit a Hurricanrana to send Jericho into the corner. RVD went for a kick to the fallen Jericho, but Jericho moved, causing RVD to crotch himself on the bottom rope. Jericho waited for RVD to get back to his feet, and nailed the Breakdown, before covering for a 2 count. Jericho AGAIN went for the Walls of Jericho, and again RVD reversed it, this time into a roll-up that got a 2 count. Jericho breaks the pinfall, but ends up shoving RVD into the referee, who gets knocked down to the mat. This allows someone to come to the ramp, and the crowd erupt as Shawn Michaels runs down to the ring. Seeing Jericho just getting up, he begins tuning up the band, and when Jericho turns around, he nails a Sweet Chin Music to Jericho’s chin! The referee manages to recover enough to see RVD climb to the top rope, and nail the Five Star Frog Splash! RVD covers, and gets the huge win! HBK dances up the ramp as RVD celebrates in the ring, as Raw goes off the air!

 

~Winner by Pinfall: Rob Van Dam~

~Crowd: 90%~

~Match: 90%~

~Overall: 89%~

~Stars: ****~

 

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~ OVERALL SHOW: 81%~

~TV RATING: 5.68~

~Attendance: 7,526~

~Takings: $301,040~

 

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Match of the Night: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Jericho

Worst Match of the Night: Jeff Hardy vs. Christopher Nowinski

Segment of the Night: Ric Flair interview

Worst Segment of the Night: RNN Update

Show MVP: Ric Flair

Show Idiot: Christopher Nowinski

 

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E-MAILS

 

ArnAnderson@WWE.com: Ric Flair’s interview at the beginning of Raw was superb, and it’s made him more popular as a result.

 

DeanoMachino@WWE.com: Terri has checked into rehab because of a cocaine addiction. No word on whether she will return.

 

JohnnyAce@VinceMcMahonFanClub.com: The guy you hired to be the lawyer wants to know if he has a permanent place in the WWE. I’ve sent him to OVW for training, his name’s Johnny Jeter.

 

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Thanks for the feedback so far guys :)

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Good show, I wasn't keen on the idea of Jericho interviewing RVD before they had a main event later in the show but how it turned out with RVD getting attacked I didn't mind so much.

 

Oh' date=' and Nicole, if you have any more pics like the ones you sent me, send those as well.[/quote']

*wonders if it was the same Nicole, hmmm*

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PREVIEW

 

THE MIND OF A DEMENTED GIANT

 

http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/bigshow/images/03.jpg

 

When you've just had a match, what you want to do is head back to the locker-room, and get ready for the long ride home. What you don't want is an unstopple 7'2" giant coming towards you, and Chokeslamming you through the announcers' table.

 

No such luck for Chris Benoit. Will the Rabid Wolverine recover enough to make a rebuttal tonight? And how will the Big Show explain his actions?

 

Also, we have heard rumours that due to a virus, John Cena will not be in the house, so Rey Mysterio Jr. will have the night off to worry about any match he might have.

 

Stephanie McMahon will be around, and hopefully she can help to build the SmackDown! side of the 2003 Royal Rumble. But what will she decide?

 

Find out this Thursday night on UPN's SmackDown! (8/7 CT)

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9th January 2003

 

Hosts: Michael Cole & Tazz

 

Heyman explains the Show’s actions…

 

SmackDown! kicks off this week with the Big Show being led to the ring by his manager Paul Heyman, with the intention of speaking to the crowd. Heyman has his left arm in a sling after his suffering at the Crippler Crossface last week.

 

Heyman: Good evening. Before you stands possibly the most fearsome, the most destructive, the most incredible wrestler to have ever set foot in World Wrestling Entertainment! And not only that… not only is this man all of those things, but he is also a humanitarian! Last week, this man saw his manager and good friend, my good self, Paul E. Heyman, being hideously attacked by that vile midget Chris Benoit, and he ran to the ring, and DESTROYED him! He picked his worthless body up and Chokeslammed him through the announcers table. So not only does this man have everything that a truly great wrestler should have, but he also…

 

Before Heyman can finish, Show interrupts him and takes the microphone off him.

 

Show: Paul, I did save your ass last week, and I’m glad that I did. However, that wasn’t my only reason for doing it. You see, on the last SmackDown! of 2002, Chris Benoit, that “vile midget” as you called him, defeated me! The Big Show! And NOBODY who is that damn small, and that damn puny should be able to beat me! So next time I go up against that a**hole, I want to beat him from pillar to post, and I want that to be at the Royal Rumble!

 

Heyman grabs the mic back.

 

Heyman: But Show, I thought we’d agreed you’d be entering the Royal Rumble?

 

Show: Well I’ll do both. I’ll kick Benoit’s ass from here to Canada, AND I’ll win the Royal Rumble!

 

Heyman; You know that’s a good idea, but I doubt Stephanie will go for it…

 

As if on cue, Stephanie McMahon comes to the top of the ramp, microphone in hand.

 

Steph: Paul, not for the first time, you’re very right. You see, tonight, Chris Benoit will take on Rey Mysterio Jr. to name the #1 Contender for a title shot at the Royal Rumble. So Show, I’m afraid you won’t be able to fight Benoit at the Rumble, but if things go a certain way, you COULD be facing him in the main event of WrestleMania.

 

Show: I’m gonna destroy him anyway. I’m gonna…

 

Heyman: …That sounds fine, because Benoit has NO CHANCE of winning against Angle. Thank you very much Miss McMahon.

 

Rating: 90%

 

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Match #1

Shannon Moore vs. Rikishi

 

Shannon takes on the much larger Rikishi in a match that he would normally struggle to do well in, especially considering that Matt Hardy was nowhere to be seen. However, Moore managed to put in a good performance, and despite the disadvantages he suffered from, he nearly won the match on several occasions with his high-flying offence. But Rikishi soon manages to get the win, catching another flying move from Moore and turning it into a Spinebuster, before sitting on Moore for the win. After the match, Matt Hardy makes an appearance as Rikishi goes to shake hands with Moore. Hardy attacks Rikishi from behind, and continues to attack him whilst Moore looks on.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Rikishi

Crowd: 63%

Match: 72%

Overall: 67%

Stars: **1/2

 

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Backstage, Paul Heyman is walking around looking smug. However, he walks into the wrong room, and walks face to face with Brock Lesnar.

 

Heyman: Um… hi Brock!

 

Lesnar: … what the hell do you want?

 

Heyman: I uh.. got the wrong room. Sorry. I’ll just be going… but first, I’d like to remind you that as long as Kurt Angle is champion, and you go against me, you won’t get a title shot. You need me Brock. You need me to make you the star you used to be.

 

Lesnar: I don’t need you.

 

Heyman: Oh you do. Now you’re a failure, a shadow of what you used to be. You know it.

 

Suddenly, Brock starts going for Heyman, and Heyman runs away. The two run around a corner, and we hear a clatter of steel on skull, and the camera gets round to seeing Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas standing over Brock, chairs in hand.

 

Heyman: I love it when a plan comes together.

 

Rating: 78%

 

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Match #2

Tajiri vs. Nunzio

 

Tajiri and Nunzio both brought some foreign-techniques to the ring, and provide a very good, if short match. Despite being in control, Nunzio makes the mistake of allowing Tajiri to start his kicking, and soon Tajiri nails the Lethal Kick to take the victory. Afterwards, Nunzio threatens that this isn’t over, and walks away.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Tajiri

Crowd: 63%

Match: 94%

Overall: 78%

Stars: ****

 

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Backstage, Chris Benoit is preparing for his big match later tonight, when Edge walks into his locker-room.

 

Edge: Hey Chris. I just wanted to let you know that I’ve got your back tonight.

 

Benoit: Uh… thanks. But aren’t you Rey’s friend?

 

Edge: Yeah, but I want this match to end as fairly as possible. No Cena interruptions, no Show interruptions, just a straight match between you and Rey.

 

Benoit: Well Stephanie said Cena isn’t in the building tonight, so you just have to look out for Show.

 

Edge: No problem.

 

Benoit: You sure?

 

Edge: Yeah, he may be the BIG Show, but there’s a reason he’s not called the SMART Show! Good luck man!

 

Benoit: Yeah, you too.

 

Raing - 82%

 

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Match #3

Non-Title Match

The Holly Cousins vs. Los Guerreros (WWE Tag Team Champions)

 

The newly reformed Holly Cousins gave it their all in this match, hoping that a victory might get them a Tag Team Title shot at the Royal Rumble. However, the Guerreros are too much of a fluid team for them, and after some neat double-team moves, Eddie heads to the top rope to hit the Frog Splash on Crash. Hardcore runs over to knock him down, but Chavo dropkicks him off the apron. Eddie then completes the Frog Splash, and the champions take the routine victory.

 

Winners by Pinfall: Los Guerreros

Crowd: 71%

Match: 93%

Overall: 82%

Stars: ****

 

But their joy is short-lived, when Team Angle run out from the back and attack the victors from behind. Benjamin hits a Superkick on Chavo, and then Haas and Benjamin both hit a Double Dropkick on Eddie to knock him out of the ring. Spying Los Guerreros’ title belts on the mat, the two young rookies take turn in putting the belts on each other, and apparently enjoying having the gold around their waists, they head off, leaving Los Guerreros lying in and out of the ring, beaten and beltless.

 

Rating: 77%

 

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Match #4

Edge vs. A-Train

 

Edge goes up against the A-Train in a match leading on from last week’s SmackDown!, when Rey and Edge lost out to A-Train and Big Show, and also a re-match from Armageddon, where Edge won by DQ. This week however, Edge seemed to be incredibly focused and determined to defeat the larger A-Train. However, it doesn’t all go to plan, after A-Train manages to turn an attempted Missile Dropkick by Edge to set him up for the Train Wreck. But Edge manages to slide down behind A-Train, comes off the ropes, and nails the big man with the Spear. The cover is made, and Edge takes the victory

 

Winner by Pinfall: Edge

Crowd: 77%

Match: 76%

Overall: 76%

Stars: ***

 

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Backstage, WWE Champion Kurt Angle is intending to leave the building, despite not appearing on the show thus far. Josh Matthews manages to catch up with him to get a word.

 

Josh: Kurt, in just moments Chris Benoit will take on Rey Mysterio Jr. to decide who will take you on for the WWE Championship at the Royal Rumble. Aren’t you going to stay around to watch the match?

 

Angle: Watch the match? Josh Matthews, Tough Enough loser, why on earth would I, Kurt Angle, Olympic Gold Medal winner, want to waste my time watching a match I really have no interest in whatsoever. You see Josh, I have beaten Chris Benoit on many occasions, and, let’s face it, Rey Mysterio Jr. hardly poses much of a threat. The only threat I can see is the other five dwarves being jealous that Dopey and Grumpy are getting a chance at the Number One Contendership!

 

Josh: Aren’t you being a little cocky in your approach to this match?

 

Angle: Cocky? Me? I severely doubt that. Now if you don’t mind, I have a limousine waiting for me, and besides, I don’t want to talk to you any more. Goodnight.

 

And with that, Kurt walks off into the night…

 

Rating: 89%

 

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MAIN EVENT

Match #5

#1 Contenders Match

Chris Benoit vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

 

Despite the popularity of both men, the match suffered as a result of the crowd not knowing which wrestler to cheer for. However, there can be no doubting the quality of the match, with both Benoit and Mysterio putting in a good performance; hardly surprising considering what’s on offer to the winner. Benoit often tries to lock the Crippler Crossface in on Rey, but the San Diego-native manages to keep avoiding being fully locked into the submission move, even managing to turn one attempt into a variation of the 619. However, Rey cannot go on avoiding Benoit, and ends up being German Suplexed with great power, so Rey goes all the way over and finishes up on his back. With Rey down, Benoit heads to the top rope, and nails the Swandive Headbutt! Benoit makes the cover, and gets the three count to become the Number 1 Contender!

 

Winner by Pinfall, and #1 Contender: Chris Benoit

Crowd: 74%

Match: 88%

Overall: 81%

Stars: ***1/2

 

But once again, Benoit’s joy turns to despair, as the Big Show comes out once again, and heads straight for Benoit. Show clubs away at him from behind, and knocks him down to the mat, where he stands on his throat for ten to fifteen seconds. Show then throws Benoit outside, and starts removing electrical equipment from the announcers table for the second week in a row. However, Rey is back to his feet, and he makes an attempt to try and stop the assault. Rey fares little better though, and is thrown viciously into the ringpost. However, the distraction gives Benoit enough time to climb over and grab a steel chair. Benoit hits Big Show over the head with it, making the big man stumble, but not fall down. This gives Benoit and Rey enough time to get away, but SmackDown fades out with the Big Show looking madder than ever!

 

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OVERALL RATING: 78% (-)

TV RATING: 6.10 (+1.37)

Attendance: 7,502 (-28)

Takings: $300,080 (-$220)

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match of the Night: Tajiri vs. Nunzio

Worst match of the Night: Rikishi vs. Shannon Moore

Segment of the Night: Show/Heyman interview

Worst segment of the Night: Team Angle steal the titles

Show MVP: Chris Benoit

Show Idiot: Rikishi

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

E-MAILS

 

PatPatterson@HotMales.com: Brock Lesnar lost overness from his attack by Team Angle, probably due to the inexperience of his attackers.

 

GeraldBrisco@BodyShop.com: Eddie and Chavo Guerrero have similar styles, and work well as a team.

 

FitFinlay@IrishPride.com: Rikishi and Shannon Moore didn’t click in their match due to differing styles.

 

TheRock@LatestMovie.com: How about giving me some matches with Scott Steiner?

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

So, any comments? :P

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Cheers Nic :)

 

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PREVIEW

 

The Champion Arrives

 

http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/angle_k/images/06.jpg

 

Velocity is proud to welcome the WWE Champion Kurt Angle to the show, as the Olympic Hero gets ready to face Chris Benoit at the Royal Rumble. The Champ will go one-on-one with Tajiri in the main event of the show.

 

Also, you can see Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas make their Velocity debuts, and Matt Hardy Version 1.0 taking on Billy Gunn, as well as all the important parts from this week's SmackDown!

 

Don't miss Velocity this Saturday at 11/10 p.m. CT on TNN.

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Match #1

Matt Hardy vs. Billy Gunn

 

This battle of two winners from last week’s Velocity ends up a closely fought contest, with both men getting very close to taking the match. However, it’s Matt Hardy who takes it, reversing an attempted One and Only into the Twist of Fate to get the pinfall victory.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Matt Hardy

Crowd: 75%

Match: 75%

Overall: 74%

Stars: **3/4

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -

 

Recap #1

Big Show/Chris Benoit

 

Big Show being led to the ring by his manager Paul Heyman, with the intention of speaking to the crowd. Heyman has his left arm in a sling after his suffering at the Crippler Crossface last week.

 

Heyman: Good evening. Before you stands possibly the most fearsome, the most destructive, the most incredible wrestler to have ever set foot in World Wrestling Entertainment! And not only that… not only is this man all of those things, but he is also a humanitarian! Last week, this man saw his manager and good friend, my good self, Paul E. Heyman, being hideously attacked by that vile midget Chris Benoit, and he ran to the ring, and DESTROYED him! He picked his worthless body up and Chokeslammed him through the announcers table. So not only does this man have everything that a truly great wrestler should have, but he also…

 

Before Heyman can finish, Show interrupts him and takes the microphone off him.

 

Show: Paul, I did save your ass last week, and I’m glad that I did. However, that wasn’t my only reason for doing it. You see, on the last SmackDown! of 2002, Chris Benoit, that “vile midget” as you called him, defeated me! The Big Show! And NOBODY who is that damn small, and that damn puny should be able to beat me! So next time I go up against that asshole, I want to beat him from pillar to post, and I want that to be at the Royal Rumble!

 

Heyman grabs the mic back.

 

Heyman: But Show, I thought we’d agreed you’d be entering the Royal Rumble?

 

Show: Well I’ll do both. I’ll kick Benoit’s ass from here to Canada, AND I’ll win the Royal Rumble!

 

Heyman; You know that’s a good idea, but I doubt Stephanie will go for it…

 

As if on cue, Stephanie McMahon comes to the top of the ramp, microphone in hand.

 

Steph: Paul, not for the first time, you’re very right. You see, tonight, Chris Benoit will take on Rey Mysterio Jr. to name the #1 Contender for a title shot at the Royal Rumble. So Show, I’m afraid you won’t be able to fight Benoit at the Rumble, but if things go a certain way, you COULD be facing him in the main event of WrestleMania.

 

Show: I’m gonna destroy him anyway. I’m gonna…

 

Heyman: …That sounds fine, because Benoit has NO CHANCE of winning against Angle. Thank you very much Miss McMahon.

 

Chris Benoit vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

 

However, Rey cannot go on avoiding Benoit, and ends up being German Suplexed with great power, so Rey goes all the way over and finishes up on his back. With Rey down, Benoit heads to the top rope, and nails the Swandive Headbutt! Benoit makes the cover, and gets the three count to become the Number 1 Contender!

 

But once again, Benoit’s joy turns to despair, as the Big Show comes out once again, and heads straight for Benoit. Show clubs away at him from behind, and knocks him down to the mat, where he stands on his throat for ten to fifteen seconds. Show then throws Benoit outside, and starts removing electrical equipment from the announcers table for the second week in a row. However, Rey is back to his feet, and he makes an attempt to try and stop the assault. Rey fares little better though, and is thrown viciously into the ringpost. However, the distraction gives Benoit enough time to climb over and grab a steel chair. Benoit hits Big Show over the head with it, making the big man stumble, but not fall down. This gives Benoit and Rey enough time to get away, but the Big Show is looking madder than ever!

 

Rating: 76%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap #2

Team Angle/Los Guerreros

 

Los Guerreros vs. The Holly Cousins

 

Hardcore runs over to knock him down, but Chavo dropkicks him off the apron. Eddie then completes the Frog Splash, and the champions take the routine victory.

 

But their joy is short-lived, when Team Angle run out from the back and attack the victors from behind. Benjamin hits a Superkick on Chavo, and then Haas and Benjamin both hit a Double Dropkick on Eddie to knock him out of the ring. Spying Los Guerreros’ title belts on the mat, the two young rookies take turn in putting the belts on each other, and apparently enjoying having the gold around their waists, they head off, leaving Los Guerreros lying in and out of the ring, beaten and beltless.

 

Rating: 79%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #2

Team Angle vs. Joey Ryan and Ricky Marvin

 

Fresh from the recap of their antics on SmackDown!, Team Angle come to the ring wearing the WWE Tag Team titles around their waists. The match itself is more or less a squash, however the talent of Ryan and Marvin shines through regardless of how little offence they get. Team Angle eventually take the win with a superkick from Benjamin into a roll up by Charlie Haas for the three count.

 

Winners by Pinfall: Team Angle

Crowd: 57%

Match: 90%

Overall: 73%

Stars: ***1/4

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Brock/Angle video

 

We see a recap of the feud so far, going from Angle winning the title from Big Show at Armageddon 2002, and then turning on Brock and joining Paul Heyman the SmackDown after. We then head to the confrontation last week, and Angle’s cockiness at defending his title at the Royal Rumble.

 

Rating: 78%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #3

MAIN EVENT

Non-Title Match

Kurt Angle (WWE Champion) vs. Tajiri

 

The WWE Champion’s appearance on a B-Show such as Velocity may seem surprising to the viewers, but despite the rather lowly setting, Tajiri and Angle put on an incredible match for the fans. Using variations of chain wrestling, speed moves, and submission holds, the two opponents continue back and forth for some time. However, it is the WWE Champion who gets the victory, putting Tajiri in the Ankle Lock, and pulling him away from the ropes on several occasions, eventually forcing the Japanese star to tap out.

 

Winner by Submission: Kurt Angle

Crowd: 83%

Match: 100%

Overall: 91%

Stars: ****1/2

 

After the match, Tajiri goes to shake Kurt’s hand after their fantastic bout, and Angle accepts… only to pull Tajiri in, and hit him with the Angle Slam! Angle stands in the ring with himself and the WWE title, as Velocity fades out!

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

OVERALL SHOW: 74% (+12)

TV RATING: 4.45 (+23)

Attendance: 7,505 (- 19)

Takings: $300,200 (- $760)

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Best Match: Kurt Angle vs. Tajiri

Worst Match: Billy Gunn vs. Matt Hardy

Best Recap: Team Angle/Los Guerreros

Worst Recap: Show/Benoit

Show MVP: Kurt Angle

Show Idiot: Billy Gunn

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

E-MAILS

 

Tajiri@WWE.com: I want to be moved up the card!

 

PatPatterson@SexyGuyz.com: I think Joey Ryan and Ricky Marvin might have a future here. Send them to OVW for some extra training first though.

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

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PREVIEW

 

The Rumble's On It's Way...

 

http://raw.wwe.com/superstars/hurricane/images/06.jpg

 

In just one week's time we will be at the Royal Rumble, the first step on the road to WrestleMania. Tonight on Heat the first RAW competitor in the 30-man Royal Rumble match will be decided when The Hurricane takes on Christopher Nowinski!

 

Also, Rico will be in action against Al Snow, and Spike Dudley goes up against Stevie Richards! Don't miss Heat, Sunday evening, at 7/6 CT on TNN!

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12th January 2003

 

Match #1

Rico vs. Al Snow

 

This opening match is a closely fought one, with Al Snow using his experience against the more flamboyant Rico. Snow almost has the match won after hitting Rico with the Snowplow, but he is distracted when Jamal comes to ringside. The Samoan doesn’t do anything however, but his presence delays the pinfall, and Rico is able to kick out. Snow goes to pick Rico up again, but with Jamal on the apron distracting the referee, Rico hits a low blow. He then comes off the ropes and nails Snow with the Spin Kick to take the win. Afterwards, Jamal enters the ring, and ascends the ropes ready to hit the Big Splash, but Maven runs in to drag Al out of the ring, ensuring that Snow does not get squashed by the big Samoan.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Rico

Crowd: 72%

Match: 80%

Overall: 76%

Stars: ***

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap #1

HHH and Scott Steiner

 

 

Flair: Last week… last week we saw this man here, the World Heavyweight champion, the Cerebral Assassin, the Game, Triple H, was defeated by that Neanderthal wannabe Scott Steiner in an arm wrestling contest. Now my client Triple H would love to be able to register his disgust to you all, but he’s embarrassed. Not only is he embarrassed about losing to Scott Steiner in that arm wrestling contest last week, but also because he’s embarrassed about having to be in Phoenix tonight! So I’m gonna be speaking for him, and you idiots are gonna listen to me! Last week was a one off! That will be the LAST time you see Steiner defeat The Game at anything! And if anyone even thinks that come the Royal Rumble, when Triple H defends his World Heavyweight Title against Steiner, Steiner’s gonna beat him then and become the World Champion, you can think again! These pointless little games mean nothing! Eric Bischoff may have put an order out to stop Triple H and Steiner touching each other before their match, but that doesn’t mean I can’t! So guess what Steiner, you’re gonna have your first match in the WWE for some time, when you take on me, The Nature Boy, RIC FLAIR! WHOOOO!

 

The crowd understandably cheer this announcement.

 

Flair: I don’t know what you guys are cheering for, because I sure as hell don’t wanna do any wrestling in this god-forsaken city! It’s gonna be me, Ric Flair, versus Scott Steiner, next week, in Mohegan Sun, Connecticut !! WHOOO! But as for tonight, Steiner, you haven’t signed your contract for your title shot, so make sure you’re around later to sign it in THIS VERY RING!

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Triple H and Ric Flair come back to the ring, where a table and chairs have been set up for the contract signing. The sirens then wail, and Scott Steiner makes his way out, complete with his usual chainmail headdress and his new ‘Big Poppa Pump’ t-shirt (available at WWEShopzone.com) (p.s. not really). Steiner climbs into the ring, and takes a seat, followed by Triple H, whilst Flair remains standing, overseeing the proceedings.

 

Flair: Right Steiner, if you can read the contract before signing it, provided that is you can actually read, then we get this over with.

 

However, Steiner jokingly offers his arm to Triple H for another arm-wrestling contest, which incenses Flair and HHH. Steiner takes his contract and signs it, before passing it over to HHH. Triple H then looks over the contract, annoying Steiner by not getting it over with quickly. Triple H then signs the contract, and hands it to the lawyer. The lawyer opens his briefcase, but instead of putting the contract in, he takes a steel pipe out, and smashes Steiner over the head with it! Flair then removes his jacket, as the lawyer continues to hit Steiner with the pipe. HHH watches on smiling as Flair and the lawyer continue beating away at Steiner, who now has a cut in his forehead/

 

Rating: 83%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #2

Test vs. Joey Ryan

 

A very quick match between the two very different superstars, with Test controlling the goings-on from start to finish. Ryan managed to get a shot or two in, but his offence was cut short by a Big Boot from Test, which was enough to get the Canadian the pinfall win.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Test

Crowd: 55%

Match: 72%

Overall: 63%

Stars: **1/2

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap #2

RVD and Christian

 

Chris Jericho comes out to introduce us to his new talk show, the Hi-Lite Reel.

 

Jericho: Ladies, gentlemen, and ugly children of all ages, allow me to introduce you to the debut edition of Chris Jericho’s Hi-Lite Reel! Now tonight, I was going to invite a very special guest to be the first interviewee for the show, and it was going to be somebody famous from right here in Phoenix, Arizona! But then I realised that there was NOBODY famous from Phoenix, so I changed my mind, and when Eric Bischoff told me that I would have the MAIN EVENT of the evening, I decided to invite my opponent on to the show, so give it up, for Rob, Van, Dam!

 

“One of a Kind” by Breaking Point hits, and Rob Van Dam comes out, looking slightly nervous about getting in the ring with the notoriously devious Jericho. However, he gets into the ring, and takes one of the two chairs on the set.

 

Jericho: RVD, it’s nice to see you here. So, let’s get straight to it, why did you want to team up with Kane?

 

RVD: Well Kan…

 

Jericho: Or maybe I should say, what “benefits” were there to teaming with Kane?

 

RVD: Um… well…

 

Jericho: I mean, was it a mutual relationship, or was Kane the dominant partner?

 

RVD: What the hell are you talking about?

 

Jericho: Oooh, looks like I’ve hit a nerve! Well you and Kane were kinda close, maybe you were very close?!

 

RVD: Well you and Christian are “kinda close”, maybe YOU and him are “very close”?!

 

Jericho: Heh, you know that’s funny, because Christian himself should make an answer!

 

From out of nowhere, Christian hits the ring behind RVD, and nails him from behind. He then picks RVD up, and drops him throat first on the back of his chair, before hitting the Unprettier on Mr. Monday Night. Jericho and Christian laugh at the pain of RVD, whilst Kane is nowhere to be seen…

 

Rating: 78%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #3

Spike Dudley vs. Steven Richards (w/ Victoria)

 

The runt of the Dudley litter seems to be the underdog in every match, but this time he managed to maintain a certain amount of control throughout the match. However, his progress was constantly disrupted by the presence of Victoria, who continuously tried to trip Little Spike up. Eventually, one of Victoria’s distractions pays dividends for Richards, and he is able to nail Spike with the StevieKick to take the win. After the match, Trish Stratus runs down to the ring to attack Victoria, and stop Spike from suffering any more abuse.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Stevie Richards

Crowd: 60%

Match: 75%

Overall: 67%

Stars: **3/4

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Recap #3

Booker T/Goldust and UnAmericans

 

 

Booker T vs. Test

 

Booker then comes off the ropes and nails the Scissors Kick, but Test manages to kick out. Booker picks him back up, and hits a second scissors kick, which is enough to keep Test down. Booker starts to celebrate with the Spinaroonie, but soon enough, Lance Storm and William Regal run down to the ring, and begin assaulting the Tag Team champion. Goldust runs in to try and save his partner, but he also suffers at the hands of Regal, Storm and the recovered Test.

 

Rating: 78%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

The Hurricane’s intentions…

 

Pre-taped earlier today, Jonathan Coachman speaks to The Hurricane.

 

Coach: Hurricane, tonight you will go one on one with Christopher Nowinski to decide which one of you goes into the 30 Man Royal Rumble next Sunday. How do you prepare for a match like this?

 

Hurricane: Citizen Coach, it is simple for a superhero like me to be prepared for a match like this, because I am prepared for anything! Be it an old lady dropping her handbag, a cat stuck up a tree… or the chance to enter the second most important match of the year, with the chance of heading to WrestleMania and fighting in the Main Event. No matter what Citizen Coach, I will go out there tonight and give it my best shot, for the Royal Rumble wants, nay NEEDS… a superhero to take part! So stand back, ‘cos there’s a Hurricane comin’ through!

 

Hurricane whooshes off, as we get ready for our main event.

 

Rating: 75%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #4

MAIN EVENT

For a place in the 2003 Royal Rumble

The Hurricane vs. Christopher Nowinski

 

This important match-up is incredibly close throughout, with both competitors trying their best to defeat their opponent to take a spot in the Rumble match. Nowinski looks favourite to win at the later stages, hitting a rolling front slam on Hurricane, but only getting a two count. He takes Hurricane down with a suplex, and then heads to the top rope. However, the elbow drop is missed as Hurricane rolls out of the way just in time! Hurricane manages to get back to his feet, and comes off the opposite ropes, before nailing Nowinski with the Shining Wizard! Hurricane then covers, and takes the win! Heat fades out with Hurricane celebrating his entry to the Royal Rumble!

 

Winner by Pinfall: The Hurricane

Crowd: 66%

Match: 75%

Overall: 70%

Stars: **3/4

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

OVERALL SHOW: 71%

TV RATING: 5.74

Attendance: 7,514

Takings: $300,560

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match of the Night: Al Snow vs. Rico

Worst Match of the Night: Test vs. Joey Ryan

Best Other: HHH/Steiner recap

Worst Other: Hurricane interview

Show MVP: Rico

Show Idiot: Joey Ryan

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

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PREVIEW

 

UNCLE ERIC TO DECIDE RUMBLE PARTICIPANTS

 

http://raw.wwe.com/results/010603/images/Stl0001.jpg

 

Eric Bischoff has told WWE.com exclusively that he will have some important news regarding his brand’s entries into the Royal Rumble this Sunday, and many places will be decided! With The Hurricane already entered after winning a match on Heat, who will join the superhero in the quest for the Rumble victory?

 

Also, last week on RAW, Shawn Michaels gave Chris Jericho some Sweet Chin Music to remember after Jericho had insulted HBK earlier in the night! How will Y2J respond? And the big main event of the evening will see Ric Flair go one-on-one with the Number One Contender for the World Heavyweight Championship, Scott Steiner!

 

Don’t miss Raw, Monday Night on the NEW TNN! (8/7 CT).

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13th January 2003

Hosted by Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

 

Bischoff starts the Rumble process

 

Raw kicks off with the General Manager of the Raw brand Eric Bischoff coming to the ring, accompanied to the ring by his Chief of Staff Sean Morley.

 

Bischoff: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Monday Night RAW! Now unless some of you people have been living under a rock, and let’s face it, some of the housing in the outskirts of Conneticut is a bit like living under one, you’ll know that on Sunday night, it will be the Royal Rumble 2003, the first step on the road to WrestleMania XIX. Now as General Manager of RAW, it’s my duty to announce which fifteen of my superstars will enter this prestigious match. And it gives me great pleasure to announce the first entrant from the RAW brand… Sean Morley!

 

Morley takes the mic from Bischoff.

 

Morley: Why thank you Mr. Bischoff, and may I say that I will do my very best to make sure that I am the last man standing, and that it will be me taking on the World Champion at WrestleMania!

 

Bischoff: Thank you Sean, and good luck. Well that’s one down out of fifteen, but let’s move on. I am also happy to announce another four entrants, Chris Jericho, Christian, Shawn Michaels and Kane! These four will battle it out to take the Number 29 spot in the Rumble, as unfortunately, the number 30 spot has gone to SmackDown. Another four places are up for grabs tonight in a four on four elimination match, with the winning team entering the Rumble. It will be Rico, Bubba Ray Dudley, Jeff Hardy and Test against Rosey, Jamal, D-Von Dudley and Tommy Dreamer! AND, Rob Vand Dam and Batista will get their chance to qualify in separate singles matches! So with all that happening tonight, as well as Scott Steiner taking on Ric Flair, it’s gonna be a hell of a show. And remember, it was brought to you by me, Eric Bischoff!

 

Rating: 87%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #1

Molly Holly vs. Ivory

 

With this match deciding which lady would go to the Royal Rumble to fight for the Women’s championship, both women gave it their all to try and take the match. The momentum shifts back and forth throughout, with Ivory nearly taking the victory with a crossbody from the top rope. However, it is Molly that takes the match in the end, hitting the Molly-Go-Round shortly after Ivory misses a charge in the corner.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Molly Holly

Crowd: 75%

Match: 56%

Overall: 69%

Stars: *1/2

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Arriving backstage, true to his word last week, is Randy Orton, complete with a sling on his still injured shoulder. Terri manages to catch up with him.

 

Terri: Randy Orton, you promised us that you’d be here this week, but the question still remains, what are your intentions for being here?

 

Orton: Terri, I could answer that question. Sure, I COULD answer it, but I COULD do a lot of things. I COULD come here and announce my entry into the Royal Rumble this Sunday, my first match back since my DEVASTATING shoulder injury, in fact, a lesser man might not even be here tonight. I COULD announce to the world that I, Randy Keith Orton, am coming back from injury ten times stronger, ten times more determined, and ten times more focussed. Or, I could be here to take care of some personal business.

 

Terri: … Well which one of those is it?

 

Orton: You really wanna know? All of them.

 

Terri: ALL of them?

 

Orton: I am entering the Royal Rumble, I am stronger, more determined and more focussed, and I AM here tonight at Raw to take care of some personal business. Now if you don’t mind, that’s exactly what I’m gonna do.

 

Rating: 71%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #2

For a place in the 2003 Royal Rumble

Rob Van Dam vs. Christopher Nowinski

 

With a Royal Rumble place up for grabs, RVD and Nowinski go hell for leather to try and win the match, with Nowinski trying extra hard to try and provide an upset, after getting a second chance despite his defeat on Heat to the Hurricane. RVD however dominates most of the match, getting near falls after a Rolling Thunder and a Split-Legged Moonsault. Nowinski almost takes the match with a DDT, but RVD responds with a Spin Kick to the face, and then hits the Five Star Frog Splash to take a spot in the Rumble.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Rob Van Dam

Crowd: 72%

Match: 82%

Overall: 77%

Stars: ***

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Backstage, Bubba Ray Dudley and D-Von Dudley are backstage in the locker-room, discussing tonight’s situation.

 

Bubba: Hey look bro’, we’re going against each other tonight, but let’s not let this stand in the way. One of us is going into the Royal Rumble for the first time, and one of us isn’t.

 

D-Von: I know man, I know, but let’s just remember that whatever happens, we’re a team.

 

Bubba: That’s right, and as a team, we have to help each other out.

 

D-Von: Damn right!

 

Bubba: Which is why I think you should lay down and let me go to the Rumble.

 

D-Von: What? Why should I?!

 

Bubba: Because I’m the senior partner!

 

D-Von: So what? I’m the one always getting the tables!

 

Bubba: Ok, ok, we’ll see what happens, let’s just see what happens.

 

D-Von: Fine by me.

 

Rating: 71%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #3

For a place in the 2003 Royal Rumble

Batista vs. Al Snow

 

With Ric Flair absent preparing for his match tonight, Batista is unaccompanied to the ring, but this does not distract the big man, who executes a strategic and vicious beating on Al Snow. Due to the damage sustained by Snow throughout the match, Batista doesn’t even need to use his usual finisher, the Sitout Powerbomb, instead getting the job done with his trademark Spinebuster, winning the match to take him into the Rumble.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Batista

Crowd: 73%

Match: 84%

Overall: 78%

Stars: ***1/4

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Backstage, Chris Jericho speaks with Jonathan Coachman.

 

Coach: Chris Jericho, last week on RAW, we saw the Heart Break Kid, Shawn Michaels, delivered a Sweet Chin Music to you that ultimately cost you your match with Rob Van Dam….

 

Jericho: You’re damn right he cost me my match Coach, and do you know why? Shawn Michaels cost me my match because he is jealous! This is a guy who six or seven years ago was the top of the game, he was the icon of professional wrestling. But you know what Coach, this isn’t 1996, this is 2003. This isn’t the era of HBK anymore; this is the era of Y2J. The Has-Been Kid should just give up his desperate attempt at staying at the top, hell he couldn’t even keep a title for more than a month. It’s time for Michaels to step aside, and I’m gonna prove tonight not only to him, but to the world, that I AM the new icon!

 

Rating: 90%

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

Match #4

For FOUR places in the 2003 Royal Rumble

Bubba Ray Dudley, Test, Jeff Hardy and Rico vs. D-Von Dudley, Tommy Dreamer and 3 Minute Warning

 

In this elimination match-up, Tommy Dreamer was the first one out after receiving a Twist of Fate/Swanton Bomb combination from Jeff Hardy. Rico then tagged himself in, and unashamedly laid down for his client Jamal to come in and pin him. Jeff was the next victim, receiving the Samoan Drop from Rosey followed by a Big Splash from Jamal to send him packing. Rosey himself was then eliminated shortly afterwards following a Bubba Bomb from Bubba Ray.

 

Teams left: Bubba Ray and Test vs. D-Von and Jamal

 

The second member of 3 Minute Warning was soon following his colleague, after running into a Big Boot from Test, who had previously refused to enter the match. His previous apathy to his team drew the anger of Bubba Ray, and the Dudleys momentarily joined forces to hit the 3D on Test, before Bubba Ray pinned him, leaving just the Dudleys to battle it out. In the end, Bubba took home the victory for his team, after reversing an attempted Dudleyville Drop by D-Von into the Bubba Bomb. After the match, the two Dudleys shook hands and embraced to the cheers of the crowd.

 

Winners: Bubba Ray Dudley, Test, Jeff Hardy and Rico

Crowd: 71%

Match: 67%

Overall: 69%

Stars: **1/2

 

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Backstage, Ric Flair gets the camera all to himself.

 

Flair: You know tonight, the Nature Boy Ric Flair, the dirtiest player in the game, is gonna go one on one with the genetic freak, Big Poppa Pump, Scott Steiner. You know, I was in the NWA and WCW for so many years, won so many titles, had so many matches, but I only faced Steiner ONCE. That was at Clash of the Champions Fourteen, and guess what. It ended as a draw. I was the NWA Champion, Steiner was the United States champion, and the match ended as a draw. So you know what that means Steiner? You know what that means? It means that you and I have unfinished business to take care of! This may be 2003 and not 1991, but although the ages have changed, the skills are deteriorating, just remember; it doesn’t matter how old your opponent is… it’s what he does to you that counts. Remember that Steiner, because very soon, you’re gonna feel like you did all those years ago! But that will be nothing compared to how you’ll feel after the Royal Rumble this Sunday, after Triple H wipes the mat with your broken carcass. So Steiner, I’m gonna see you real soon in the ring, and I’m gonna take you back to school! WHOOO!

 

Rating: 99%

 

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Match #5

For the #29 Spot in the 2003 Royal Rumble

Chris Jericho vs. Christian vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Kane(?)

 

Despite the announcement that he was in the match, Kane was nowhere to be seen, and after a bit of waiting, the referee decided he was automatically eliminated by count-out.

 

Unsurprisingly, the two Canadians Jericho and Christian go straight after HBK, double teaming him to try and eliminate him early on. The two hit a Double Suplex on Michaels, but then begin to argue over who is going to pin him, leading to a shoving contest, which in turn generates into a fist fight. Christian manages to clothesline Jericho out of the ring, but as he pins HBK, Michaels kicks out. Jericho heads back in and begins to attack Christian, as HBK gets back to his feet and is happy watching the two friends battle it out. However, the friends make a quick truce and go to attack HBK. However, this time HBK is able to deal with the two, backdropping Jericho out of the ring, and then hitting the Sweet Chin Music on Christian, before covering him, and eliminating him from the match.

 

With just Jericho and HBK left, the two start trading blows, with Jericho getting the advantage after a thumb to the eye. Jericho unloads some chops, before sending HBK upside-down into the ropes. Jericho follows up with a low dropkick, attempting to hit HBK in the face, but HBK manages to sit up enough, and Jericho ends up sliding into the ring post. HBK climbs down from the turnbuckle, and stomps away at Jericho, before heading to the opposite corner. He starts tuning up the band, but as he advances, Jericho releases some sort of powder from his hands, blinding HBK. Jericho then hits a Superkick of his own, and then comes off the ropes with a Lionsault to pin the still blinded HBK. Jericho leaves the ring pleased with his success at becoming the Number 29 entrant in this Sunday’s Royal Rumble.

 

Winner by Pinfall: Chris Jericho

Crowd: 88

Match: 85

Overall: 87

Stars: ***1/2

 

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Match #6

MAIN EVENT

Scott Steiner vs. ‘Nature Boy’ Ric Flair (w/ HHH)

 

Steiner is constantly distracted by the presence of the World Heavyweight Champion at ringside, but the two men obey Eric Bischoff’s orders, and do not provoke or make physical contact throughout the match. However, Flair manages to take advantage of Steiner’s distractions, with his usual cheap shots of offense, including a thumb to the eye, before he begins to work on Steiner’s left leg with elbow drops, chopblocks, and by wrapping Big Poppa Pump’s leg around the ringpost. Flair then goes for the Figure Four Leglock, but after a determined battle against the move, Steiner is able to use his strength to overturn the move, and reverse the pain. Flair however manages to reach the ropes before much damage can be done. Steiner then takes control of the match, hitting the SteinerLines, and the trademark kiss bicep/elbow drop to get a two count. Steiner locks in the Steiner Recliner, but HHH grabs hold of Flair’s foot and puts it on the rope, meaning that the hold is broken. Steiner goes over to have words with HHH, which allows Flair to come up from behind and roll Steiner up with a Schoolboy, but Steiner kicks out at two. Flair charges at Steiner as he gets back up, but Steiner dodges out of the way, and Flair hits the turnbuckle face first, before stumbling back into Steiner, who picks him up in a Reverse DDT position, lifts him up, and drops him on the back of his head. Steiner then covers, and takes the pinfall victory! HHH climbs into the ring to check on Flair, before the two contenders for the World Heavyweight Title stand in the centre of the ring, staring eyeball to eyeball. However, Steiner doesn’t see Randy Orton run into the ring behind him, and nail him from behind with a steel chair! HHH starts directing traffic as Orton and Flair begin to beat Steiner down, leaving him a bloody mess as Raw goes off the air!

 

Winner by Pinfall: Scott Steiner

Crowd: 91%

Match: 62%

Overall: 82%

Stars: **1/2

 

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OVERALL SHOW: 80% (- 1%)

TV RATING: 5.27 (-0.41)

Attendance: 8,016 (+ 490)

Takings: $320,640 (+ $19,600)

 

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Match of the Night: Chris Jericho vs. Christian vs. Shawn Michaels

Worst Match of the Night: 4 vs 4 Elimination

Best Segment of the Night: Flair interview

Worst Segment of the Night: Bubba/D-Von segment

Show MVP: Ric Flair

Show Idiot: D-Von Dudley

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

E-MAILS

 

JerryJarrett@NWATNA.com: Sorry son, but I’ve signed your guy Simon Diamond on a written contract. We had him first! Yee-haw!

 

MollyHolly@GrannyPanties.com: Me and Ivory didn’t click in our match, how about giving me a match against Lita?

 

ChrisJericho@Fozzy.com: I think I should be moved up the card after my INCREDIBLE performance on RAW!

 

ChrisBenoit@ToothlessAgression.com: How about booking me and Kurt Angle in some matches?

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

 

CURRENT ROYAL RUMBLE CARD

 

World Heavyweight Championship

Triple H © vs. Scott Steiner

 

WWE Championship

Kurt Angle © vs. Chris Benoit

 

Women’s Championship

Victoria © vs. Molly Holly

 

Royal Rumble Entrants

 

Chris Jericho (#29)

Shawn Michaels

Kane

Christian

Randy Orton

Rob Van Dam

Batista

Hurricane

Bubba Ray Dudley

Jeff Hardy

Test

Rico

Maven

Sean Morley

 

Big Show

 

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

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Cool, really looking forward to the Rumble. I think you portray most of the characters really well, only a couple of things from Raw I wasn't buying.

 

Flair Vs Steiner. Well, I say I wasn't, I wouldn't have bene if you didn't have interference and stuff. I think Flair can be a credible opponent with the right sort of opposition, like Orton, Jericho, HBK, RVD, someone who's not too big and dominating. It's like in WCW when they tried to make Goldberg and Flair seem like credible opponents. Flair may have been way over but that doesn't mean anyone could take him seriously as a legitimate threat to someone the size of Steiner. Of course the intereference worked all that out.

 

Other thing is Randy Orton. The previous Orton segments you've done were pre taped, where he had planned what to say etc and he kept on the ball. His interview no Raw would have been live and when he's given the mic live and asked to speak he has a tendency to go off on a tangent half way through and start rambling on about stuff that makes no sense before remembering what he's supposed to be saying and sorting himself out. I suppose with the Terry interview he had someone else there to direct him, and it wasn't a long promo or anything, but once you give him some serious mic time I want to see rambling.

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Cheers for the feedback Jay. And don't worry about the extra post, makes the diary look better from the outside ;).

 

The Flair/Steiner thing was all down to what I had no control over. Before 1st January 2003, HHH vs. Steiner was already announced for the Rumble, and Bischoff had already made the rule that they couldn't make physical contact except under certain circumstances before their match. So even though I have NO interest in this match whatsoever (I haven't even put HHH and Steiner in a feud on the game), I have to build the match up due to it being part of the card, and without Orton and Batista around in an Evolution role (not at the moment anyway), it was left to Flair to help build up the PPV match.

 

Orton is someone who I'm confused about. I've seen three of his promos, one was very bad (a live one to be exact), one was very good (the one at WMXX, pre-taped), and one was in the middle. Therefore not only do I not have a full grasp of what he actually says in interviews, but also not a clear view of how well he delivers them. Thanks for pointing out about his rambling though, gives me something to aim for :).

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to be honest if I was writing an Orton promo I would start off with a point in my head that I was trying to make, make it and sound good making it but keep talking and talking writing whatever came into my head, then finish the promo. With most guys I would have a read thruogh and perhaps check it over. With Orton, don't. Leave it as it is because he has the same sort of rambling and errors in his promos.
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