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Martial Arts

What happens when you watch too much wrestling


Guest Y2James

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Guest Y2James

On your resume you write "I'm the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be"

 

You call a beer by your name

 

Instead of hugging relatives you give them bear hugs & mandible claws

 

You begin to shake someone's hand in public, but then hesistate to look for the crowd's response

 

You tell your significant other, "Not tonight, I'm watching RAW"

 

Every time you sit down a table you consider how easily it might break if you were to moonsault it

 

You get in fights with people who say wrestling is fake.

 

On a job application, you state your residence as "parts unknown"

 

After you beat someone up, you spray paint their back

 

You clothesline people in the supermarket for no real reason.

 

You elbow smash your dog & turn him/her over for the three count

 

You do heel turns on your best friends for no reason

 

You don't understand why there are wars when a steel-cage/grudge match would settle everything.

 

Instead of reading a bedtime story to your kids, you put them in a sleeper.

 

Instead of punishing your kids by grounding them, you threaten them with stunners, choke slams & tombstones

 

When your king-size bed has ropes and turnbuckles surrounding it.

 

You get fired from work then show up the next day wearing a mask.

 

You are refereeing a sporting event and just as someone is cheating you turn your head.

 

Your boss fires you and you come back to work and challenge him to a no-holds barred steel-cage wrestling match.

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Guest Kakarot

Nice

 

You begin to shake someone's hand in public, but then hesistate to look for the crowd's response

 

:lol I love that one.

 

Every time you sit down a table you consider how easily it might break if you were to moonsault it

 

Ha. I do that all the time. Moonsaults, elbows, chokeslams. Mines made of glass, and sometimes I have to be physically restrained from powerbombing twhoevers nearest to me.

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Guest The Doctor

I have some more!

 

You are never "cut" - you are "busted wide open"!

 

You attack your friends from behind with a chair, and look around the room, waiting for crowd reaction.

 

You have wrestling matches with your dog.

 

You Job to your dog.

 

Everytime you walk pass someone lying down, you feel the sudden urge to put them in a Sharpshooter.

 

Everytime you come in contact with a roll of duct tape, you wrap it tightly around your wrist.

 

When someone shakes your hand, you want to follow with a boot to their mid-section and...

 

You no longer call your girlfriend "your girlfiend," she is now your "valet."

 

Everytime your boss tells you do not present the proper corporate image, you want to call him "The dumbest SOB you have ever met," and hit him with a Stunner.

 

You wont enter a room until the lights go out and there is a fireworks display.

 

Quote passages from The Raven every time you meet people.

 

You want four weeks worth of video promos of you shown to anyone before you meet them for the first time.

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You wont enter a room until the lights go out and there is a fireworks display.

 

My mates and I did this at a work Christmas Party a couple years back. We were sat quite near the entrance and they had these flambeaux (a cloth being blown up by a fan with red and yellow lights underneath making it look like flames) set up either side of the lift doors. I lost count of the number of times one of us got in the lift, went to the ground floor and came back up again just so that we could step out and strike a Booker T pose. :)

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Guest The Doctor
My mates and I did this at a work Christmas Party a couple years back. We were sat quite near the entrance and they had these flambeaux (a cloth being blown up by a fan with red and yellow lights underneath making it look like flames) set up either side of the lift doors. I lost count of the number of times one of us got in the lift' date=' went to the ground floor and came back up again just so that we could step out and strike a Booker T pose. :)[/quote']

I would have done the same. *sigh* We are sad, sad little people... :D

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My mates and I did this at a work Christmas Party a couple years back. We were sat quite near the entrance and they had these flambeaux (a cloth being blown up by a fan with red and yellow lights underneath making it look like flames) set up either side of the lift doors. I lost count of the number of times one of us got in the lift' date=' went to the ground floor and came back up again just so that we could step out and strike a Booker T pose. :)[/quote']

 

LMAO :lol. AC, you are a legend.

 

 

You Job to your dog.

 

Ummm... what type of job?

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Guest The Doctor
And that's somehow better? :?

I thought maybe the phrase "job" had been interpreted in some hideous, hideous way with illegal sexual connotations.

So yes, him standing on my chest for a three count is a damn site better IMO! :)

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I thought maybe the phrase "job" had been interpreted in some hideous' date=' hideous way with illegal sexual connotations.[/quote']

 

I'm sure the word "Beat" might have similar connotations... :eek

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Guest The Doctor
I thought maybe the phrase "job" had been interpreted in some hideous' date=' hideous way with illegal sexual connotations.[/quote']

 

I'm sure the word "Beat" might have similar connotations... :eek

Eeeeeeeeeew. :sick

Who do you think I am? Rebecca Loos?

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What happens when you watch too much wrestling? You don't shave around your chin from October until late December then go up to people you barely know and say "It wasn't...my...fault!".

 

Er, not that I'd know about that...

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Guest Y2James
What happens when you watch too much wrestling? You don't shave around your chin from October until late December then go up to people you barely know and say "It wasn't...my...fault!".

 

I have been saying that alot but im not to sure about the shaving thing.

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I used talk like Austin when I was in an argument and would talk really fast, and ALWAYS finish with, And that's the bottom line,...Cos I said so! **The shame**

 

And anyone lying down is asking for it *oo-er*.

I once was in my room when I stayed with my Mum and had a step-ladder that I used to sit on and chill. One day my mates were in and one of tehm lay accross my bed in a prone position. I couldn't resist and did an Atomic Arabian Facebuster (Course I didn't know what it was at the time) with a ring binder and out him through my bed an dbroke two of his ribs in the process.

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Guest Kakarot
I used to share a pretty large room with my brother. He had a normal bed one side of the room. And I had a raised bed that went up to near the roof the other side, with a gap of at least 5 foot in between. I dont think I need to explain any more.
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